nosenobounds | 002 • voice

[ Aw yes, journal mark two. Usopp's pretty much becoming an expert with this stuff, if he says so himself.

(Spoilers: he does. Readily.)

He is certainly much calmer and more seemingly confident than last time, anyway. And for once, he gets right down to business. As it were. He's trying to sound very informed and businesslike regardless. ]

All that crazy experiment stuff definitely got me thinking, since I was lucky enough not to forget a bunch of stuff. I actually ended up making a really important decision! Important for everybody in Luceti! [ Super important. Important as balls. He clears his throat as dramatically as possible. ]

Starting right now, I'm officially reinstating the Usopp Pirate Crew! And we're recruiting for our Luceti division! You only have to like stories and having a lot of fun and not being bored to join! [ So basically kids he can try to keep entertained in their sparetime and radical immature people like him, he guesses. But maybe other types of people will be interested in a place like this. It never hurts to try. ]

As an Usopp Pirate, it's your job to keep things from getting too boring or quiet in the village! You're making a promise to protect the things that are important to you and to follow your dreams! And our first important mission is gonna be ship-building for a big sea excursion! Who would want to miss out on that, right? Just call me Captain! [ Cue a mighty hands-on-hips laugh. He is kind of lying, surprise surprise. In reality, Usopp means a lake excursion. And probably toy boats. Probably. He'll see if his real excursion plans can be made with a hackneyed army of… whoever volunteers. If they volunteer at all. Not one to count his chickens on that front.

He ends the post there for all of eight seconds. Then he remembers he had another thing to say before he got carried away with his impressive leadership skills. Oops. ]

Oh, right. Rapunzel! I finished your patience award! I'm widely revered as a great award-maker back home, you know, so it's pretty amazing. You'll wanna get it its own pedestal and everything. [ What, that's completely legit. ] But I kind of realized I don't know where to find you, either. It would be good to actually award it to you, so if you wanna meet anywhere, let me know!

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[she giggles. Never change, Usopp]

If you're recruiting, perhaps I'll be your rival. After all, what's a pirate if he has nothing to fight against, ne?

Ohh, you wanna be the Usopp Pirates' rival in being interesting, huh? That could probably give my men the right inspiration to achieve greatness! Are you sure you want to risk us rising to power?

Are you suggesting I should crush you now?

Should a person even always say scary things like that?! It's probably bad for your health!

Is it scary? [she sounds completely surprised at this] Don't rivals usually say such things?

[she hasn't even talked about killing your men and hearing the lamentations of your women yet.]

W- well, yes, of course they do! I'm completely used to that kind of thing by now, with all my experience in battle! [ CHEST PUFFING OUT. Liar from the womb to the tomb, bb. ] But it's not like everybody else who might join up is from our kind of world. You've gotta ease new members into that stuff before you go saying it really convincingly.

[ Okay, that is actually... half true. He figures if anybody signs up they're most likely gonna be some kind of kid. And he knows personally that Robin's not bad, but she's got a real doozy of a way of saying creepy things. The gang back home probably would have run screaming.

Not that that's really surprising. Usopp's other half is just all "how is she so good at being creepy and will I ever be used to it." ]

Isn't that underpreparing them for the serious nature of our fight? After all, you don't go into the Grand Line thinking it will just be a pleasure sail, ne?

Well no, but- it's not exactly about that. I guess it's not your fault if you don't know, though, since you probably lived a pretty dangerous life even before you got stuck here. [ Siiiigh. The curses of piracy and being from the future. How sad, truly. He's shaking his head and everything. ] Don't worry, though! I can definitely explain it.

I lived hunting zombies and using their tortured bones to construct my ship.

[a sad sigh and then a bright smile]

So I could use the advice.

[ If he were drinking, there would have been a huge spit take there. As it is, he just chokes on air and indignation, as is his wont. ]

That's exactly what I'm talking about! People need things that they can think about without thinking about tortured bones and serious battles! They should always be able to smile about something when they want to be smiling! [ It's pretty much how he gets through half of anything. ] Th- there's a balance to think of is all! Kids can handle a lot more than people usually think, but I don't want any of them getting upset about something, either.

[ Man, this is so much more work than it was back home. ]

002 • voice

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