[A full license to brag about things sounded pretty good]

Well, my accomplishments are pretty fricking awesome captain pinnochio.

So, there I was minding my own business sneaking into a baseball game when all of the sudden we got invaded by those green guys called Skrulls. Green guys, thought they would take over the earth, like pretty much most aliens think they can.

[He gives this a wave of a hand]

Bullshit right? I mean, just because you have fancy technology or whatever you think you can conquer a planet that is pretty much stuffed with heroes to the brim. Not to mention all the super villains who really don't like outside interference in the 'bizz. Anywho, back to the stadium. So I end up popping out of my costume, obviously fully armed and stuff, because who goes places without weapons, am I right?

[He shakes his head and chuckles a little, like being unarmed was an amusing concept.]

So I start lighting the bastards up, left, right and center. Took those suckers out like it was a duck hunt, oh they managed to give a certain amount of fight here and there, but I was on fire that day. Like literally on fire at some point, but I totally went with it and rocked out with it. In the end it was me just taking out those bastards like a boss.